i hate saying goodbye. it sucks.
last night, my friend had to surrender her adopted 6-month old son, talon. a large group of family, friends, and neighbors gathered to support my friend and her family at this difficult time. originally, the family was told the baby would be taken at 6 pm. i arrived at their house at about 5:40 pm. around five minutes later, someone came outside and announced that the baby wouldn’t be taken until 7 pm and that everyone could go either come back closer to then or go inside the house. many wondered, including me, if the delay was a ploy to have fewer people at the house. i decided to stay and went inside to see my friend. she was standing inside the door with talon sleeping in her arms. i hugged her and couldn’t hold back my tears. i whispered how sorry i was, knowing that my words would do little to ease her suffering. i stayed in the house for a while, amazed at all the love and support inside and outside of the house. i really had no idea what to do and felt somewhat helpless, but i heard someone say that it was enough to just be there. two local news crews were there interviewing my friend and others in the house. a police car arrived at 7:15 pm with a car seat then left. the supporters outside, who were talking amongst each other, became quiet. after a while (not sure what time it was), more police cars arrived escorting another car. the people outside were asked to clear the walkways. the supporters began to sing a hymn. my friend and her family brought out talon, placed him in the car, said their final goodbyes, and watched as their son was taken away. i didn’t see anyone there that wasn’t emotional at this point.
my friend has been in a legal battle practically since birth to keep talon. the birth mother, an admitted heroin addict, chose my friend’s family as the adoptive parents. after giving birth and signing over talon, she changed her mind and wanted him back. the birth mother is part native american and got the tribe involved to help get the baby back. the day that talon turned 6 months old, my friend was told that they would have to surrender him to the tribe. both of the birth parents have been deemed unfit due to their drug use, however, so talon will be placed in foster care. this just doesn’t make sense to me! how is it right to take talon from a loving, stable home and place him in foster care just because he is part native american? he doesn’t even have enough blood to be considered for admittance into the tribe, and yet they have fought tooth and nail to make sure that my friend’s family can’t have him. it’s just so wrong! i had the wonderful opportunity to meet talon on friday. i was able to hold him and feed him. he was such a joy to be around. even when he was hungry and tired, he was always happy. the love in the house was so apparent from the moment you walked in, even with all that they’ve been through. so, for me, it is hard to grasp how the tribe can take him from that loving home and place him with strangers.
as for the other 2 i have, let’s just say that absence doesn’t always make the heart grow fonder. (insert evil laugh here – hahahahahaha!)